Street Spirit October 2004

Crying Out for Compassion

by Maureen Hartmann

Homeless artists portray the suffering on the streets and the search for love and healing.

Two formerly homeless senior artists, Jose Querdo and David Wolter, created deeply symbolic paintings at St. Mary's Center in Oakland that were recently exhibited on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. The artworks meaningfully express each artist's maturation, and the influences of their past experiences in shaping their lives.

In an interview, Querdo and Wolter spoke candidly about the inspiration for their artwork, their life paths and their connection to St. Mary's Center.

Describing his painting, "Surrender," Jose Querdo said, "It actually came out of the third step of the twelve-step program in which you turn your will and life over to the care of God. I drew Christ carrying the cross and wrote, 'Thy will be done.' Through the Recovery 55 program at St. Mary's and after going to meeting after meeting, I came to realize that there was a power greater than myself."

Querdo also painted "The Committee," a male torso with three heads. Two heads are brown and look off to the side; one is red and looks straight ahead.

Querdo said of this artwork, "The whole thing behind it is that I'm dually diagnosed. I was a drug addict, and I have a mental illness. The coil which runs down the neck and chest is my backbone and nervous system. The middle is the me you see right now, my self connecting to my body. All three of the heads have different things going on at the same time. In my bipolar mind there are many, many thoughts going on at the same time. There are only three heads in the painting because of the lack of paper."

Querdo's art came out of an extremely rough life. He said that, beginning in childhood, he didn't live with either of his parents, plus he raised his younger brother. "We lived in the lower bottom of West Oakland on the other side of Peralta Street." As an adolescent, he said, "I was a heroin addict at age 13. I went to the Youth Authority at the age of 14 for robbery."

While he was in Juvenile Hall, his mother took over raising his brother and, when he got out again, he took over the raising of his brother again. When he had to go back to Juvenile Hall, his mother took charge of his brother once more, and when he was released a second time, he took his brother back again.

As an adult, Querdo said that he did nine years in the state prison at Pelican Bay for bank robbery, and two other terms in San Quentin for robbery. He never worked in his life. He was homeless when he got out of prison the last time because none of the drug rehabilitation programs would take him. He was "too incorrigible."

The Higher Power must have been with Querdo, for he met a friend, Conrad, in San Quentin Prison in 1964. Years later, he ran into his old friend on the street, and in 2001 his friend brought him to St. Mary's for a hot lunch. Conrad introduced Querdo to his case manager, Linda Diamond, who asked him what he would like to do for himself. Querdo said he would like to kick his drug habit. Diamond told him about Recovery 55, an alcohol and drug recovery program that meets daily at 9:30 a.m. at St. Mary's.

Nonviolence and love

David Wolter spoke of the connection of his painting, "Cry Out for Compassion," to his personality. The painting depicts half of a woman's face. The eye has a peace sign in the pupil. Falling from the eye are four tears, with symbols of Taoism, Christianity, Islam, and Judaism inside each of the tears.

Wolter said of his relation to the painting: "I don't consider myself religious in the traditional sense of the word. I'm interested in how all of these religions have a belief in a Higher Power. That seems to be almost universal in the human race. They all have many of the same values. That is one of the themes I was expressing in 'Cry Out for Compassion.' The themes include nonviolence and love for your fellow man. "Paradoxically, that is the source of so much violence: people fighting over their religious beliefs. That struck me as so contradictory and is one of the things that I'm trying to express in the painting."

Wolter's life before he came to St. Mary's Center was also very rough. His mother died when he was two and a half years old, and his grandparents raised him. He said, "I didn't know it at the time, but I suffered from childhood depression." He wanted to be an artist from early childhood. "Actually," he said, "I realize that doing art was a way of expressing my feelings, of dealing with depression." In his adolescent years, Wolter had a few close friends. "My relationships always tended to be very personal. I try to express that sense of intimacy, that sense of feeling in my artwork."

He carried his depression into his adult years. "The fear of isolation, of people leaving, that's been sort of a constant theme. One way it shows up is that when people move away, I tend to cut off contact with them. Other ways it shows up is fear of forming relationships because I am afraid that they will leave.

"The only relationships I do form tend to be very personal. I feel I can trust that person. Another way it shows up is a need for independence. I want to be able to do everything for myself so that I won't have to depend on anyone else."

Depression in his adult years definitely influenced "Cry Out for Compassion," as the woman he portrayed was someone who felt shut out and estranged from society by all the violence in the world.

Wolter was homeless from November 2000 to April 2001 and was staying in the men's shelter at the Oakland Army Base. He became homeless when he had to move and could not find affordable housing. He was employed at the time for the City of Oakland, working with seniors seeking to re-enter the job market, and teaching basic computer skills. He got in touch with St. Mary's through a coworker.

Susan Werner, intern art therapist at St. Mary's Center, contrasted Querdo's art to Wolter's. Of Querdo's art, Werner said, "He portrays his personal suffering and transformation in his art work." She adds, "For Jose, artmaking is an antidote to substance abuse. He unites with whatever he is experiencing and opens to the depth of his soul. Jose enjoys discovering a relationship between creativity and self-healing."

Werner notes that, "Wolter's work expresses his keen sensitivity to the impact of violence on all people and awareness of unity amongst all people regardless of one's religious beliefs." Querdo's and Wolter's artworks were displayed in an exhibit on Capitol Hill entitled "Creative Aging: Beyond Words," sponsored by the American Association of Art Therapy. The two men traveled with Werner to see the exhibit on display from June 14-18, and to advocate for housing for low-income people.

Werner said, "Artwork makes visible and real the range of human experience. Art, in presenting the human condition, can evoke in someone heightened awareness, a sense of shared humanity, or a compassionate response to suffering. Artwork by seniors at St. Mary's Center often conveys a person's capacity to transform and offers hope for making changes in one's life."

Exhibiting art on Capitol Hill is one way of influencing legislators, and lobbying is another. While in Washington, D.C., Querdo, Wolter, and Werner spoke with legislative assistants of our local senators, Barbara Boxer and Dianne Feinstein, and Rep. Barbara Lee and aides of members of the Appropriations Committee for HUD.

Querdo presented the need for extremely low-income housing units. He mainly spoke about the National Affordable Housing Trust Fund Act sponsored by Rep. Barbara Lee, and expressed his gratitude to Lee. He pointed out that Congress has been focusing on legislation for people buying homes, which is not an option for extremely low-income people. Querdo's testimony was very appropriate given the dire shortage of low-income housing.

Wolter spoke about issues regarding the Department of Housing and Urban Development's (HUD) Section 8 program that pays a percentage of one's rent, based on a person's income. The House of Representatives and the Senate voted for full funding of Section 8 vouchers in FY 2004. In April 2004, HUD made cuts to the funding that affected housing for families, disabled and elderly people.

Wolter was one of the lucky ones whose Section 8 funding was not cut off. Still, the amount of rent he pays as a Section 8 participant has increased 18 percent, a greater rate of increase than his income.

Wolter stated, "The cuts also have a devastating effect on landlords in terms of accepting Section 8 tenants. If Section 8 payments are going to be cut,landlords are not going to accept Section 8 tenants. Cuts also have an effect on the building of low-income housing. Developers are less interested in creating low-income housing because they're not sure of the government's policy on supporting people who want to move in."

Once back in Oakland, Werner, Querdo, and Wolter shared the excitement about the trip to Washington, D.C., at "Us Together," a daylong celebration of community held at St. Mary's. Art by Querdo and Wolter and other formerly homeless artists at St. Mary's Center were exhibited. Querdo and Wolter were presenters and spoke of their meetings with legislators, as well as their viewing of the exhibit. Querdo said it was "an indescribable experience" to watch other people viewing their art.

Other senior speakers talked about advocating for social change and about their personal transformation since coming to St. Mary's Center. According to Carol Johnson, executive director of St. Mary's, about 200 community members attended the exhibit, including several providers from different agencies. Johnson said, "I think at this time in our experience, we can't miss opportunities to come together and celebrate who we are and what we do in our local and in our national community. We really wanted to include as wide a spectrum of people as possible."

Querdo presently is a student at Merritt Community College, where he recently received a certificate in substance abuse counseling. Querdo is aiming for an AA degree in social science and hopes to get a BA degree in social work at San Francisco State College. Wolter continues to be employed by the City of Oakland and to train seniors in computer skills.

Werner talked about the strength of character in Querdo and Wolter, as well as other senior artists at St. Mary's. She said, "These men and women are courageous in making art to learn about them. Inevitably, they discover their own vitality, inner wisdom and unique gifts."

Susan Werner of St. Mary's Center contributed to and helped edit this article. Click on this link to visit St. Mary's website: http://www.stmaryscenter.org/.

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